Ask SEND EDventures: March

In this month’s Ask SEND EDventures, we’re talking about the challenges families are facing right now, including understanding behaviour, coping with busy environments, supporting friendship and social confidence, and looking after your own wellbeing.

Understanding Behaviour

Q. “How do I know if my child’s behaviour is 'challenging' or if they’re actually communicating a need?”

It’s very common for behaviour to be misunderstood, and many children with SEND communicate distress, overwhelm, pain or uncertainty through actions rather than words. Instead of thinking about “good” or “bad” behaviour, it helps to ask what your child might be trying to tell you: Are they tired? In pain? Overstimulated? Confused? Frightened? Struggling with change?

Keeping a simple diary and sharing it with your child’s school, GP, or other professionals can help identify patterns. If behaviour is linked to anxiety, sensory processing, health difficulties or unmet needs, they need understanding and support, not sanctions.

For further guidance, Scope offers excellent UK-based advice and parent support.

Coping With Busy Environments

Q. “My autistic daughter gets overwhelmed in busy places. Should I avoid them, or keep pushing exposure?”

Many children with SEND struggle in noisy, crowded or unpredictable environments. It’s not about avoiding life but making it accessible. Planning visits during quieter times, preparing your child with visuals or simple explanations, building in breaks, using ear defenders if helpful, and always having an exit plan can help if it becomes too much. Small, positive experiences build confidence better than forcing situations that cause distress.

If sensory processing differences are a big factor, you can find helpful advice and resources from the National Autistic Society.

Friendship and Social Confidence

Q. “My son has few friends and seems on the edge of social groups. How can I support him without forcing friendships?”

Friendship doesn’t look the same for every child, and many children with SEND value connection on their own terms. Try to focus on environments where your child feels accepted and understood, rather than pressured to “fit in”. Shared interests and activities can feel more natural than traditional playground socialising.

Practising social situations through talking or role-play can also help build confidence. Books such as Growing Friendships: A Kid’s Guide to Making and Keeping Friends can be really helpful for children who are trying to navigate friendships.

If loneliness is affecting their wellbeing, speak to the school so they can support them socially too. YoungMinds offers supportive guidance for parents worried about friendships, confidence and emotional wellbeing. 

Supporting Yourself Emotionally

Q. “I feel exhausted and guilty all the time. How do I look after myself without feeling selfish?”

You are not selfish for needing rest, support or breathing space; you’re human. Parenting a child with additional needs can be demanding emotionally, mentally and physically, and your wellbeing matters. Small steps like taking breaks, talking to someone who understands, and asking for help where possible can make a big difference.

If things feel overwhelming, it’s OK to talk to your GP or seek emotional support for yourself too. Carers Trust supports different types of carers and may be a helpful place to find practical help, emotional support, and local connections.

Disclaimer: The information in this article is provided for general interest and should not be considered medical, therapeutic or educational advice. Families are encouraged to seek support from qualified professionals regarding individual needs or concerns.